She has always been there and she always will. Centuries of evolution have failed to wipe out her species, and with each generation increases her indispensability as the world gets smarter in science and techonology. The wisecracks claim, that come what may, her position in this world is one that can never get eradicated--and yet one that will never catapult her to the annals of the hall-of-fame! And the wisecracks havent been far from the truth. For since the stone-age, there hasnt been any significant remodelling in her mediocre job profile.
She works an 18 hour shift - wakes up unfailingly to the call of the alarm clock early morning, and embarks on her daily chores. There are no 'Sundays' and public holidays, no Christmas and Diwali break. Infact festival times are the ones, when she gathers the extra ounce of energy she manages to magically produce, and works overtime.
She never fails to make enticing aromas waft from the kitchen, and serves all her culinary delights in shining cutlery - which but adds a silver lining to the perfect dining ambience. She oversees the laundry to .... and with the eye of a hawk, especially on those indelible stains, which are all considered to be a personal 'challenge' for her to get rid off. And lo-behold, when one fine morning, the washing machine decides to take a break - not a soul in the household can get away without a dose of the 'I need that fixed immediately' !!!
She belongs to those, whose bathroom cabinet contains remedies for all times -- right from a bruised knee to the common cold. Besides, she also plays the role of an unauthorized-quack, who has home-made remedies for every little of life's problems.
She vacuums the entire house, with a song on her lips, and gets only a trifle annoyed, when the dog enters with muddy paws, and is compelled to do the job all over again. She is also very particular about neatness, and makes sure that her home is a pleasure to visit for all her guests. She enhances the interiors with fresh flowers every day. Small things in life no doubt, but which do make a difference, especially, when done with love.
She is always there to welcome you at the doorstep, with a smile, when you return home tired and hungry. And her evergreen face, displays a relentless eagerness to get you a hot cup of tea even before you ask for it.
She is perpetually the one to switch off the last light in the evening, and the first one to wake up to the call of the alarm-clock the next morning. Once again starts her 18 hour shift.
She rarely complains and she never gets paid. 'Overtime' aside, there aren't any monetary benefits even for her day to day labour. For that matter, there isn’t much gratitude expressed either, for all her accomplished tasks. And infact she has to very often be the prey to immature tantrums thrown, lest any of her tasks happen to be incomplete. For that matter, no educational institution recognizes her profession and no grades are granted for her superior quality work. She isn’t even entitled for leave and neither can she quit her job. And yet she continues working, and that too uncomplainingly......
I salute her, and I salute her unrecognized profession, because she is one of those, who make our world a better place. I call her a miracle-worker, a blessing in disguise, a fairy godmother and an unbelievable human being. The whole wide world, simply refers to her as: HOUSEWIFE. After all, she has always been there, and she always will !!!
~Tweety
Sunday, July 01, 2007
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
If I had my life to live over again......
I would have played more often and pored less over my books....
I would have climbed more trees and worried less about exam scores....
I would have sailed more paper boats in the rain, than wonder if I would catch a cold in the weather....
I would have enjoyed a few more chocolates, regardless of cavities....
I would not have fretted so much over having to wear glasses in college.....
I would have sent less e-cards and more self made ones.....
I would have painted more empty egg shells ....
I would have been less conscious about having a perfect smile for the camera, and rather been myself....
I would have clicked more black-and-white pictures.....
I would have shared that ridiculous collection of pencil-erasers with my friends instead of jealously guarding it until eternity.....
I would have had more bread dipped in hot-chocolate regardless of the "what-weird taste" looks that people gave me.....
I would have stomped through some more puddles during the monsoon... and crunched a lot more dry foliage during autumn......
I would have gone on more treks...... and thought less about falling down a ravine....
I would have been more receptive when accepting criticism and more thoughtful before giving it...
I would have burst more bubble-wrap!
I would have said more "thank Q"s and "I love you"s and lesser "Sorry"s
I would have sat on more roller coasters and screamed my head off, rather than be watching from the scared-albeit-envious crowd below......
I would have always left my glasses in places where I could find them......
I would have believed in Santa till I was 18 :)
If only I had my life to live over again.........
I would have winked at some good looking hunk ;-) .... just this once !!!
~Tweety
Wednesday, April 18, 2007
They're back ...
DISCLAIMER: This post could be categorized as anything from a major crib-session, to a probable new case for the undertaking of SPCA ! Its summer time and the Miniature Musketeers are back creating havoc in my peaceful existence.. and now that they have ransacked my chocolate-store, Ive decided not to take this lying down !
=========
At the onset, let me insist, that, in life, I have always had compassion for God's lesser mortals and visibly smaller creations - but, ANTS ..... relate a different story. If ever there was a creature, I never got along with, then it is the pompous, infamous, agonising ant! Life has never been the same, ever since the Almighty (presumably in one of His not so brighter moments) decided to create these miniature musketeers, and mind you in wondrous colours of black and red. What those blasted colours signify, I do not know, but I guess color-discrimination must be existing at such insignificant levels as well.
Now the question, I ask Him is, "Why create those slimy, sleazy, good-for-nothing characters in the first place ? Haven't we got enough of them already?" And to top it, we are expected to look up to them (awed!!) as hard working, diligent chaps who have never a moment to spare ! Personally, I feel they would mint money if they were to go on stage -- especially with their perpetual put-on of the 'busier-than-thou' attitude !!
Ants have never managed to fascinate me! (I doubt they have managed to fascinate anybody else as well). They just don't seem to be in the possession of that gene which is oh-so-vital, when it comes to impressing folks in their viscinity. The more I stare at them, the more annoying they appear. Besides, they don't bother to display any hint of grace and charm either -- especially when any edible stuff that is capable of increasing your blood sugar, happens to appear in their range of vision - which they devour, with the stomach of an elephant. They happen to have the audacity to bite you as well, lest you try to retrieve your fast disappearing meal!
IMHO the purpose of these unbecoming creatures on planet earth, has never been accurately defined. There have of course been lots of ghoulish theories, but many of the more pleasant ones, happen to be half-baked attempts on behalf of the 'Pro- Ants' society, which is forever under the impression, that decent, peace loving, respectable folks like me will lead to the extinction of this precious species. As if we have the time for such "anti-social" activities... Bah !
I clearly fail to see anything remotely positive about this creature, except for the fact that, despite it's miniature size, it always manages to sufficiently impress you, after it has been on one of it's biting-sprees. Why it bites God-fearing and respectable citizens like me is a different question altogether -- But I strongly believe, that most members belonging to the above mentioned loathsome species seem to have displaced a few of those vital marbles inside their cranium. Hence the reason for those unprecedented bites, even if you happen to be on most amicable terms with them.
I enjoy flicking ants, and by the dozen. ( Hope all S.P.C.A. activists are holidaying in Timbuktu) Infact the more the merrier. I derive as much sadistic pleasure in creating hurdles on their foodie-trails, as they take in troubling me. And it is finally, after years of contemplation, that I have decided to declare open war on these obliging creatures. If you think, I'm talking through my hat, then I must say that you've had either no contact or little to do with these miniature musketeers. Just take an ant, preferably red, (no discrimination intended) under your wing for a few precious minutes, and you will realise that I haven't been making mountains out of ant-hills after all!!
~Tweety
=========
At the onset, let me insist, that, in life, I have always had compassion for God's lesser mortals and visibly smaller creations - but, ANTS ..... relate a different story. If ever there was a creature, I never got along with, then it is the pompous, infamous, agonising ant! Life has never been the same, ever since the Almighty (presumably in one of His not so brighter moments) decided to create these miniature musketeers, and mind you in wondrous colours of black and red. What those blasted colours signify, I do not know, but I guess color-discrimination must be existing at such insignificant levels as well.
Now the question, I ask Him is, "Why create those slimy, sleazy, good-for-nothing characters in the first place ? Haven't we got enough of them already?" And to top it, we are expected to look up to them (awed!!) as hard working, diligent chaps who have never a moment to spare ! Personally, I feel they would mint money if they were to go on stage -- especially with their perpetual put-on of the 'busier-than-thou' attitude !!
Ants have never managed to fascinate me! (I doubt they have managed to fascinate anybody else as well). They just don't seem to be in the possession of that gene which is oh-so-vital, when it comes to impressing folks in their viscinity. The more I stare at them, the more annoying they appear. Besides, they don't bother to display any hint of grace and charm either -- especially when any edible stuff that is capable of increasing your blood sugar, happens to appear in their range of vision - which they devour, with the stomach of an elephant. They happen to have the audacity to bite you as well, lest you try to retrieve your fast disappearing meal!
IMHO the purpose of these unbecoming creatures on planet earth, has never been accurately defined. There have of course been lots of ghoulish theories, but many of the more pleasant ones, happen to be half-baked attempts on behalf of the 'Pro- Ants' society, which is forever under the impression, that decent, peace loving, respectable folks like me will lead to the extinction of this precious species. As if we have the time for such "anti-social" activities... Bah !
I clearly fail to see anything remotely positive about this creature, except for the fact that, despite it's miniature size, it always manages to sufficiently impress you, after it has been on one of it's biting-sprees. Why it bites God-fearing and respectable citizens like me is a different question altogether -- But I strongly believe, that most members belonging to the above mentioned loathsome species seem to have displaced a few of those vital marbles inside their cranium. Hence the reason for those unprecedented bites, even if you happen to be on most amicable terms with them.
I enjoy flicking ants, and by the dozen. ( Hope all S.P.C.A. activists are holidaying in Timbuktu) Infact the more the merrier. I derive as much sadistic pleasure in creating hurdles on their foodie-trails, as they take in troubling me. And it is finally, after years of contemplation, that I have decided to declare open war on these obliging creatures. If you think, I'm talking through my hat, then I must say that you've had either no contact or little to do with these miniature musketeers. Just take an ant, preferably red, (no discrimination intended) under your wing for a few precious minutes, and you will realise that I haven't been making mountains out of ant-hills after all!!
~Tweety
Tuesday, January 02, 2007
Back To The Future
Another month, another year..... ushered in with the customary brilliance and cheer, that perennially marks the arrival of every new year! And looking back over the past coupla decades, weighing them against the current state of the world, with a lot of nostalgia (the typical drooling over the good-ol'days kinds) and a tinge of narcissism, I think we're the survivors.
First we survived being born to moms, who had never been prescribed a supplementary intake of vitamins and calcium in the form of tablets to be swallowed every morning after breakfast. Neither did they undergo any amniocentesis test, to determine if we were going to be genetically deformed at birth - And well, we arrived, all bouncy and healthy and ready to take on the world if you may please.
After overcoming this primary hurdle in our infancy, we precariously travelled on scooters on our mommy's laps, while daddy expertly manoeuvred through the not-so-dense traffic. We sat in cars that didn't have seat-belts and never felt the need for one. We played in mud and probably consumed some of it too, but no worms grew inside our tummy. We toyed around with plastic bottles and covers that had absolutely no warnings about suffocation on them... and nobody suffocated.
We fell off trees, bikes and walls - and were definitely not rushed to the hospital for a shot of tetanus at every instance. We ate pani-puri and bhel-puri from any roadside stall within our radius. We drank water from taps, water coolers in the vicinity, or shared from anybody's bottle when playing - not just sealed bottled purified mineral water- and mind you nobody died! We played hide-and-seek, cricket, hop-scotch under the hot sun, and created our own exciting adventurous games when things got mundane - and nobody had a stroke. We hadn't even heard of Age of Empires, Counter Strike and Quake. We probably created those during our adventures :) There was only a single channel on TV, and if there was nothing interesting going on (as was usually the case) we simply switched it off, and went out to play.
When we wanted to talk to friends, we went and talked to them. We played, fought, and shared stuff - all the while, having them around us in our proximity. None of us knew what "online" meant and we probably wouldn't have been very impressed either, if anyone had had the foresight to come over and explain it too ! Holidays meant, we were out playing all day, and would show up at home only when the hunger pangs struck - and no-one so much as batted an eyelid to the fact, that they were not able to reach us all day. And we were ok.. believe me, we did just fine.
We never had to memorize a list of 10 digit cell numbers (also written in our diaries stored in our school bags), indicating whom to be contacted in case of an emergency. And we never seemed to have any such emergencies that could not be dealt with, without dialing a 10 digit number.
We ate chocolates, candy and toffees all day long, and nobody gave a damn about blood sugar and diabetes. However when our consumption went a little overboard, the biggest caveat that we ever received was usually to do with cavities !! Yeah.. we survived ! Pizzas never arrived at home upon dialing a number, and we never went out and had a 'make-your-own-salad'. Our mom's made the salads at home.... we merely turned up our noses at the veggies and then just had them! However, when we did eat out, we made sure we ate all kinds of cheesy, oily and spicy stuff - and mind you, we were never over-weight because of it!
Yep, in some sense we're the survivors. We've indeed come a long way. To have been exposed to such peril and undergone such trauma at such a young age, and to have survived. Imagine......... Our grandmothers didnt even know how to google !!!!!
~Tweety
First we survived being born to moms, who had never been prescribed a supplementary intake of vitamins and calcium in the form of tablets to be swallowed every morning after breakfast. Neither did they undergo any amniocentesis test, to determine if we were going to be genetically deformed at birth - And well, we arrived, all bouncy and healthy and ready to take on the world if you may please.
After overcoming this primary hurdle in our infancy, we precariously travelled on scooters on our mommy's laps, while daddy expertly manoeuvred through the not-so-dense traffic. We sat in cars that didn't have seat-belts and never felt the need for one. We played in mud and probably consumed some of it too, but no worms grew inside our tummy. We toyed around with plastic bottles and covers that had absolutely no warnings about suffocation on them... and nobody suffocated.
We fell off trees, bikes and walls - and were definitely not rushed to the hospital for a shot of tetanus at every instance. We ate pani-puri and bhel-puri from any roadside stall within our radius. We drank water from taps, water coolers in the vicinity, or shared from anybody's bottle when playing - not just sealed bottled purified mineral water- and mind you nobody died! We played hide-and-seek, cricket, hop-scotch under the hot sun, and created our own exciting adventurous games when things got mundane - and nobody had a stroke. We hadn't even heard of Age of Empires, Counter Strike and Quake. We probably created those during our adventures :) There was only a single channel on TV, and if there was nothing interesting going on (as was usually the case) we simply switched it off, and went out to play.
When we wanted to talk to friends, we went and talked to them. We played, fought, and shared stuff - all the while, having them around us in our proximity. None of us knew what "online" meant and we probably wouldn't have been very impressed either, if anyone had had the foresight to come over and explain it too ! Holidays meant, we were out playing all day, and would show up at home only when the hunger pangs struck - and no-one so much as batted an eyelid to the fact, that they were not able to reach us all day. And we were ok.. believe me, we did just fine.
We never had to memorize a list of 10 digit cell numbers (also written in our diaries stored in our school bags), indicating whom to be contacted in case of an emergency. And we never seemed to have any such emergencies that could not be dealt with, without dialing a 10 digit number.
We ate chocolates, candy and toffees all day long, and nobody gave a damn about blood sugar and diabetes. However when our consumption went a little overboard, the biggest caveat that we ever received was usually to do with cavities !! Yeah.. we survived ! Pizzas never arrived at home upon dialing a number, and we never went out and had a 'make-your-own-salad'. Our mom's made the salads at home.... we merely turned up our noses at the veggies and then just had them! However, when we did eat out, we made sure we ate all kinds of cheesy, oily and spicy stuff - and mind you, we were never over-weight because of it!
Yep, in some sense we're the survivors. We've indeed come a long way. To have been exposed to such peril and undergone such trauma at such a young age, and to have survived. Imagine......... Our grandmothers didnt even know how to google !!!!!
~Tweety
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
Toothy Tremors
I'm sure out of every three people in this world (with teeth) at least two of them would have positively visited a dentist at some point of time in their lives. Ask any kiddo who has had the appalling misfortune to pay a visit to this dental-monster at a very young age to define him, and I'm sure he will say "He's an ooh aah ouch man" - while the rest of us deplorable-souls, would subtly refer to him as the "drill-fill-and-bill guy".
And like most of you, I too have had the opportunity to pay a visit to this dental-magician (let me be a wee bit more congenial!), on many an occasion, who has deftly practised all this tricks on my set of pearls, with great elan. However till date, I have never dreaded a visit to his lair. Reason being, my dentist simply loves to talk. And believe me, its not just idle gossip, but his monologue comprises of a varied range of topics right from the diplomatic ties between Iraq and Syria to unsolicited advice on choosing a perfect match for yourself, if you are in the single-and-ready-to-mingle phase ! All you ever have to do is : Go there, Sit back in that oh-so-comfy chair, and listen open-mouthed, while he drills.... fills...... and TALKS !
Enter his waiting room and the life size wall picture of the Bunny Rabbit, sporting a single-tooth, proudly proclaiming "I love my dentist", will definitely make your lips part into a smile - reminding you, that you possess 32 of them and couldn't possibly be so-optimistic.
The other day, as I settled down into the dental-magicians chair during yet another of my visits, I just realized how fortunate I was to have a dentist whose most effective pain-killer happened to be his non-stop blabber - which perpetually earned him a captive audience, thus making one blissfully ignore the ordeal one is about to undergo.
That day, he was in buoyant spirits - so along with my mouth, I decided to keep my ears wide open. And on he prattled, about inflation, career prospects for the present generation, the pros and cons of the Internet age, and the consequential effects it has on young malleable minds, health foods, good teeth, bad teeth, .....and my buffered memory failed to retain the rest ! By the time, he was finished with his tricks, my head was in a whirl - Was this merely a dentist-next-door or some talk show host on TV in a formidable disguise ?
One look at the bill, told me it was the former - and I had conveniently been taken for a ride on yet another occasion, by his unique painkiller! Now an unprecedented disclosure - Though I hated to admit it, I did feel a trifle wiser as I stepped out of his office. On second thoughts, by any chance did I grow a wisdom tooth while in there ?
So the next time, you visit your dentist, remember to raise your eye-brows indicating, that you're absolutely flabbergasted at his enchanting monologue (even if it is boring!). I assure you, he will definitely be far more gentle, when drilling away at your precious pearls. So relax in the chair, shut your eyes, keep your hearing aids wide open, and say "aaaaah" !
And for those hapless souls, whose dentist is a man-of-few-words, don't be discouraged. There is hope for you too. Just find out how much your dentist earns in a year, and I bet you, that will be enough for you to keep your mouth wide open for the rest of your appointment.
~Tweety
And like most of you, I too have had the opportunity to pay a visit to this dental-magician (let me be a wee bit more congenial!), on many an occasion, who has deftly practised all this tricks on my set of pearls, with great elan. However till date, I have never dreaded a visit to his lair. Reason being, my dentist simply loves to talk. And believe me, its not just idle gossip, but his monologue comprises of a varied range of topics right from the diplomatic ties between Iraq and Syria to unsolicited advice on choosing a perfect match for yourself, if you are in the single-and-ready-to-mingle phase ! All you ever have to do is : Go there, Sit back in that oh-so-comfy chair, and listen open-mouthed, while he drills.... fills...... and TALKS !
Enter his waiting room and the life size wall picture of the Bunny Rabbit, sporting a single-tooth, proudly proclaiming "I love my dentist", will definitely make your lips part into a smile - reminding you, that you possess 32 of them and couldn't possibly be so-optimistic.
The other day, as I settled down into the dental-magicians chair during yet another of my visits, I just realized how fortunate I was to have a dentist whose most effective pain-killer happened to be his non-stop blabber - which perpetually earned him a captive audience, thus making one blissfully ignore the ordeal one is about to undergo.
That day, he was in buoyant spirits - so along with my mouth, I decided to keep my ears wide open. And on he prattled, about inflation, career prospects for the present generation, the pros and cons of the Internet age, and the consequential effects it has on young malleable minds, health foods, good teeth, bad teeth, .....and my buffered memory failed to retain the rest ! By the time, he was finished with his tricks, my head was in a whirl - Was this merely a dentist-next-door or some talk show host on TV in a formidable disguise ?
One look at the bill, told me it was the former - and I had conveniently been taken for a ride on yet another occasion, by his unique painkiller! Now an unprecedented disclosure - Though I hated to admit it, I did feel a trifle wiser as I stepped out of his office. On second thoughts, by any chance did I grow a wisdom tooth while in there ?
So the next time, you visit your dentist, remember to raise your eye-brows indicating, that you're absolutely flabbergasted at his enchanting monologue (even if it is boring!). I assure you, he will definitely be far more gentle, when drilling away at your precious pearls. So relax in the chair, shut your eyes, keep your hearing aids wide open, and say "aaaaah" !
And for those hapless souls, whose dentist is a man-of-few-words, don't be discouraged. There is hope for you too. Just find out how much your dentist earns in a year, and I bet you, that will be enough for you to keep your mouth wide open for the rest of your appointment.
~Tweety
Sunday, October 08, 2006
Of birds and bees :)
Yeah.. I know nobody reads these posts. And as you have rightly figured out by now, the catchy title was just to lure you.... ;) So now that you've walked straight into this trap and are still reading, let me not totally disappoint you - The title isnt entirely irrelevant either (I wouldnt resort to such cheap tricks after all, merely to make you read !). However the only thing of relevance is the bees part of it, which refers to yours-truly. Well, let me introduce myself - This is Bee, (yep... the same one, often referred to as the Bumble-Bee), residing in a tiny hive, for the past few months, in a corner, which has not been discovered by the intelligent Muggles so far, in Tweety's office space.
Thought I'd blog about a few of the smart observations, Ive made over the past months, from my vantage point, in my hive! Personally, I think this blogging-business is totally ridiculous. Ive watched Tweety doing it for quite some time now. I distinctly recall, that it started off with a big-bang for her. I mean, I seriously wondered then and still do so now, why would the world and it's aunt, in the first place, be interested in the random ramblings of this unknown creature who answers to the call of ' Tweety' ! Well Tweety didnt think so - Infact she went a step ahead, created this inane blog and bootstrapped herself, by gatecrashing into the blogging arena, with her not-at-all-earth-shattering premier post. The rest is history....
Tweety's blog in my humble (or was that 'bumble' ?) opinion, has turned out to be way below my mediocre expectations. Its talks about anything in general and nothing in particular. It fails to enchant, and simply doesnt have that spark ! On one particular occasion, I nearly fell off my hive, when I dozed off reading about Tweety ranting and raving regarding some mundane sea-food that she had consumed at an equally mundane-place in the city! But Tweety doesnt know, or if she does, then I think she chooses to ignore. Well, I wouldnt really blame her for that though ! Ive read other blogs too. At least all those which flash across Tweety's monitor.
A large quantum of these blogs (in my bumble opinion once again), merely comprise of barmy characters, broadcasting their day-to-day activities to the rest of the world and vice versa. And then there is another equally large set of these barmy creatures who comment on these blogs as well. Regular run-of-the-mill comments, partly in appreciation, and mostly in order to ensure that you visit their own barmy-blog-space and comment in return ;) And so the comment-whirpool commences... You get into it and there's absolutely no way out. Just stop commenting and you magically ensure, that the comment count in your own blog-space goes down (pushing your alter-ego into depths of doldrums), and slowly but surely metamorphosing you into a blog-dinosaur, till one fine day you become extinct !
So finally I decided to take matters in my hands, to stop this bloggin-madness. Tweety had just opened up her blogger-space(yet again), and was about to torture the rest of the world, with her lackluster, wearisome, heart-rending outpourings, when I decided to spare you all the agony (of reading and commenting), by stinging Tweety hard, on her middle and (just as a back up in case my Operation-StingBlogger failed) the little finger of her right hand! So currently, Tweety is out-of-action for a while, nursing, the two swollen itchy fingers, which have conveniently made it a trifle difficult for her to access the keyboard. To the best of my knowledge, Tweety would be away for a while - so you folks might as well go on vacation.. but yeah.. before you do so, as a token of your profound gratitude, for sheltering you from the ultimate agony of having to read Tweety's blog (at least temporarily) do comment on this posting. Its my maiden-one after all and it would mean the world to me :)
~ Bee
P.S. A l'il secret - Ive decided if the comment count goes beyond 20, Id probably start off my own blog, and have thought of a nice and tacky name too (bee-the-best.blogspot.com)
Thought I'd blog about a few of the smart observations, Ive made over the past months, from my vantage point, in my hive! Personally, I think this blogging-business is totally ridiculous. Ive watched Tweety doing it for quite some time now. I distinctly recall, that it started off with a big-bang for her. I mean, I seriously wondered then and still do so now, why would the world and it's aunt, in the first place, be interested in the random ramblings of this unknown creature who answers to the call of ' Tweety' ! Well Tweety didnt think so - Infact she went a step ahead, created this inane blog and bootstrapped herself, by gatecrashing into the blogging arena, with her not-at-all-earth-shattering premier post. The rest is history....
Tweety's blog in my humble (or was that 'bumble' ?) opinion, has turned out to be way below my mediocre expectations. Its talks about anything in general and nothing in particular. It fails to enchant, and simply doesnt have that spark ! On one particular occasion, I nearly fell off my hive, when I dozed off reading about Tweety ranting and raving regarding some mundane sea-food that she had consumed at an equally mundane-place in the city! But Tweety doesnt know, or if she does, then I think she chooses to ignore. Well, I wouldnt really blame her for that though ! Ive read other blogs too. At least all those which flash across Tweety's monitor.
A large quantum of these blogs (in my bumble opinion once again), merely comprise of barmy characters, broadcasting their day-to-day activities to the rest of the world and vice versa. And then there is another equally large set of these barmy creatures who comment on these blogs as well. Regular run-of-the-mill comments, partly in appreciation, and mostly in order to ensure that you visit their own barmy-blog-space and comment in return ;) And so the comment-whirpool commences... You get into it and there's absolutely no way out. Just stop commenting and you magically ensure, that the comment count in your own blog-space goes down (pushing your alter-ego into depths of doldrums), and slowly but surely metamorphosing you into a blog-dinosaur, till one fine day you become extinct !
So finally I decided to take matters in my hands, to stop this bloggin-madness. Tweety had just opened up her blogger-space(yet again), and was about to torture the rest of the world, with her lackluster, wearisome, heart-rending outpourings, when I decided to spare you all the agony (of reading and commenting), by stinging Tweety hard, on her middle and (just as a back up in case my Operation-StingBlogger failed) the little finger of her right hand! So currently, Tweety is out-of-action for a while, nursing, the two swollen itchy fingers, which have conveniently made it a trifle difficult for her to access the keyboard. To the best of my knowledge, Tweety would be away for a while - so you folks might as well go on vacation.. but yeah.. before you do so, as a token of your profound gratitude, for sheltering you from the ultimate agony of having to read Tweety's blog (at least temporarily) do comment on this posting. Its my maiden-one after all and it would mean the world to me :)
~ Bee
P.S. A l'il secret - Ive decided if the comment count goes beyond 20, Id probably start off my own blog, and have thought of a nice and tacky name too (bee-the-best.blogspot.com)
Wednesday, September 27, 2006
It's better in Goa.....
Ive moved.... Feeling lost in this new blogger home! Still a trifle nostalgic for having abandoned my previous abode ! But plan to stick around here for a while. To ease the move, Ive carried over my last posting with me - so here's my debut on a crispy new blogger interface with a slightly stale posting :)
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Back to pavilion after a 10 day stint in the land of the sushegaad... and still getting the feeling, that I havent had enough of it! This year marks a decade, that Ive been living away from home. And of all the things that Ive learned upon being independent - what has amazed me the most, and continues to do so flawlessly till date, is the reaction I get from blokes around when they are enlightened that I come from Goa! Initially people's reactions were a trifle unnerving - and totally unexpected. It never failed to surprise me, that the world(read as the-rest-of-the-country), would have such meagre or such lop-sided inaccurate views, about this tiny state with its magnanimous coastline. But over the period of years, and after innumerable hilarious moments, (where in Ive stifled many a giggle in my tummy) Ive deigned to conclude, that folks around, can seriously be ill-informed regarding one of their own neighboring states. I generally make a mental note of the varied 'reactions' that I witness, when I inform that Im from Goa, and the comments that follow sure make my day :) As of now, I possess a priceless collection of these comments - and I bet you an arm and a leg, you wont hear many of those - when you inform folks that you're from Mumbai, Pune, Delhi, Kolkata, Chennai, Bangalore and the list goes on !
Just tell anybody you're from Goa... and the initial trailer you get to view, is a look of awe, a glint of envy, and a face painting vivid happy images in front of you. I like this part. Makes me happy too. Never realized that I come from a land, which paints happy-scenes for people, till I actually moved to a place, further up the coastline! And then the comment arrives. "So are you a Christian?" One of the predominently prevailing mis-conceptions - that Goans by default embrace Christianity. And before you get a chance to get this part ironed out, it is immediately followed by - "Do you go and pray in a church just like in the movies ?" (Im a pro at handling this now ;) The others are not so sober. Some cool assumptions about Goans - "So you must be good at swimming ?" or better still "Do you swim in the sea all day when you're in Goa?" (help... Im a terrestrial-mammal with a few aquatic tendencies just like you!!). However, I personally categorize this as the milder version - the inebriated version of which being ... "Is it true that you wear your swimming costume and drink Feni all the time ?" (aww.. come on!!).
One of my favourites though, is "Is Antony Gonsalves really a name in Goa ?" to the absolutely cute "I thought all aunties in Goa were called Mrs. Braganza !!" And this one truly rocks - After you're done informing that you come from Goa, there is pin-drop silence for a moment and then the genuine query pops up "So are you Portuguese ?" (And I thought Goa's been a part of India for more than four decades now !)
Well a decade down the line, when I thought I was done hearing all the possible permutations and combinations of these vagrant, witty Q's - there arrived this 'classic' one, "So you must be great at playing the guitar ?" For sizeable moments after listening to this one, I was still at sea as to why I ought to be great with the guitar-strings, just because the stork dropped me in Goa, and pretty much ashamed of the fact that I hadnt the foggiest how to do so. When I replied in the negative, I was greeted with total surprise, a touch of disdain, and a look of disapproval clearly stating "such-a-shame" - After this totally unprecedented cold-response, I did gather all the courage I could muster, and erred once, by inquiring as to why I ought to be possessing this skill...
"Well.. Remo Fernandes does so... I thought everyone in Goa plays the guitar!" (~sigh~)
~Tweety
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Back to pavilion after a 10 day stint in the land of the sushegaad... and still getting the feeling, that I havent had enough of it! This year marks a decade, that Ive been living away from home. And of all the things that Ive learned upon being independent - what has amazed me the most, and continues to do so flawlessly till date, is the reaction I get from blokes around when they are enlightened that I come from Goa! Initially people's reactions were a trifle unnerving - and totally unexpected. It never failed to surprise me, that the world(read as the-rest-of-the-country), would have such meagre or such lop-sided inaccurate views, about this tiny state with its magnanimous coastline. But over the period of years, and after innumerable hilarious moments, (where in Ive stifled many a giggle in my tummy) Ive deigned to conclude, that folks around, can seriously be ill-informed regarding one of their own neighboring states. I generally make a mental note of the varied 'reactions' that I witness, when I inform that Im from Goa, and the comments that follow sure make my day :) As of now, I possess a priceless collection of these comments - and I bet you an arm and a leg, you wont hear many of those - when you inform folks that you're from Mumbai, Pune, Delhi, Kolkata, Chennai, Bangalore and the list goes on !
Just tell anybody you're from Goa... and the initial trailer you get to view, is a look of awe, a glint of envy, and a face painting vivid happy images in front of you. I like this part. Makes me happy too. Never realized that I come from a land, which paints happy-scenes for people, till I actually moved to a place, further up the coastline! And then the comment arrives. "So are you a Christian?" One of the predominently prevailing mis-conceptions - that Goans by default embrace Christianity. And before you get a chance to get this part ironed out, it is immediately followed by - "Do you go and pray in a church just like in the movies ?" (Im a pro at handling this now ;) The others are not so sober. Some cool assumptions about Goans - "So you must be good at swimming ?" or better still "Do you swim in the sea all day when you're in Goa?" (help... Im a terrestrial-mammal with a few aquatic tendencies just like you!!). However, I personally categorize this as the milder version - the inebriated version of which being ... "Is it true that you wear your swimming costume and drink Feni all the time ?" (aww.. come on!!).
One of my favourites though, is "Is Antony Gonsalves really a name in Goa ?" to the absolutely cute "I thought all aunties in Goa were called Mrs. Braganza !!" And this one truly rocks - After you're done informing that you come from Goa, there is pin-drop silence for a moment and then the genuine query pops up "So are you Portuguese ?" (And I thought Goa's been a part of India for more than four decades now !)
Well a decade down the line, when I thought I was done hearing all the possible permutations and combinations of these vagrant, witty Q's - there arrived this 'classic' one, "So you must be great at playing the guitar ?" For sizeable moments after listening to this one, I was still at sea as to why I ought to be great with the guitar-strings, just because the stork dropped me in Goa, and pretty much ashamed of the fact that I hadnt the foggiest how to do so. When I replied in the negative, I was greeted with total surprise, a touch of disdain, and a look of disapproval clearly stating "such-a-shame" - After this totally unprecedented cold-response, I did gather all the courage I could muster, and erred once, by inquiring as to why I ought to be possessing this skill...
"Well.. Remo Fernandes does so... I thought everyone in Goa plays the guitar!" (~sigh~)
~Tweety
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